Why do shame and guilt hinder addiction treatment?

Shame and Guilt in Addiction – Breaking the Invisible Prison

Shame – The Invisible Prison

Shame is one of the most powerful emotions a person can experience. Individuals struggling with addiction often live with the belief that they have “failed everyone” — their family, friends, and even themselves. As a result, they withdraw from others, hide behind a mask of apparent calm, and deep inside feel worthless.

Shame silences them.It becomes difficult to ask for help when you feel you do not deserve it.

Guilt – When an Emotion Overwhelms Instead of Motivates

Guilt can sometimes lead to reflection and change. In addiction, however, it often becomes an unbearable burden. A person may endlessly replay their mistakes, punishing themselves mentally instead of searching for a path toward repair and healing.

This creates a destructive cycle — the more guilt they feel, the deeper the sense of hopelessness. And the deeper the hopelessness, the harder it becomes to take the first step toward therapy.

Shame and Guilt in Therapy – Understanding Comes First

At Monar, we often say that therapy begins where shame ends.

In a safe therapeutic environment, individuals learn to speak about what hurts — without fear of judgment. A therapist does not excuse harmful behavior, but helps the person view it from a different perspective: as part of a life story that can still be transformed.

Understanding that addiction is a disease, not a character flaw, opens the door to self-forgiveness.

Why Emotional Work Is Essential in Recovery

Shame and guilt can be paralyzing. If they remain unnamed and unresolved, they often lead to relapse.

That is why building self-acceptance is such a crucial part of therapy. Recovery involves learning to see oneself not only through past mistakes, but through the effort being made to change.

It is a gradual process requiring time, patience, and support — but it is this work that restores inner freedom.

Learning a New Inner Voice

Shame says:“I don’t deserve love.”

Therapy teaches a different message:“I made mistakes, but I can change.”

This subtle shift can transform a life.

At Monar in Kębliny near Łódź, we support individuals in rebuilding self-belief and understanding that everyone deserves a second chance — regardless of their past.